Why VERY INTELLIGENT Men Fail With Women The Ten Reasons Why HIGHLY INTELLIGENT Men Fail With Women… AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT… I’ve been teaching men how to become more successful with women and dating for a several years now…and one “problem scenario” just keeps coming up OVER AND OVER… and OVER and OVER and OVER again… …and it’s really amazes me. I’m going to refer to it as “The Genius Failure Paradox”. “The Genius Failure Paradox” is the tendency for UNUSUALLY intelligent men to After contemplating this particular paradox, discussing it, and working on it I assume that if you’ve read this far, then you see probably yourself as smarter You know that you’re a little different than other guys. You probably realized at a young age that you saw things differently, and thought And you’ve probably realized that your smart mind gives you an advantage over Your smart mind gives you a particular type of advantage that can be very, very Smart people get used to being “right”, because they usually ARE right. And when you’re RIGHT more often than others, you can get ahead in many situations. But unfortunately, this smart mind of yours can actually be WORSE than USELESS WOMEN AND DATING. By the way, I did say WORSE than useless. It can actually be like having a hammer when you need to tighten a bolt. If you Of course, it’s hard for a smart guy to even IMAGINE a situation where his smart But trust me, this is one of those situations. So relax, open your smart mind, and let me share with you the ten reasons why REASON #1: THEY’RE WRONG, BUT THEY CAN’T OR WON’T SEE IT OR ADMIT IT I mentioned that smart guys are used to being RIGHT in most situations. And what do most smart guys do when they come across a situation where they’re They find a new situation… one that fits their strength. They know they’ll be (OR they let the “problem situation” destroy them… more on that later.) Well, the BITCH about being wrong when it comes to women and dating is THERE’S There’s no quick “I’m right” around the next corner to make you feel better. It only takes “failing” with a few women in a row for a smart guy to see the pattern… Solution? Think harder. A smart guy just assumes that his logic must be good… so he just keeps thinking But when no success comes, it really starts to become mentally difficult. Accepting that you’re wrong is a VERY hard thing for a “smart guy”. Accepting that you’re not only wrong, but you have NO CLUE WHERE TO EVEN START Ultimately, many smart guys come up with the following logical conclusion: I AM A SMART GUY, THEREFORE IF I CAN’T FIGURE OUT HOW TO BE SUCCESSFUL WITH WOMEN Try that on for a self-defeating idea. REASON #2: THEY’RE BLIND AND ARROGANT In short, many smart guys refuse to accept that a good, solid, workable answer Let me ask you a question: If you were going to be walking across Africa on foot, would you rather have your It’s an interesting question. Now, hopefully you’d like to have the guide who isn’t the smartest guy around… But now let me ask you: If you’d like to learn how to be more successful with women and dating, would There’s something about being smart that makes some guys unwilling to accept input, Well, any SMART GUY can see the folly in this particular approach… once it’s If you’ve been making this mistake, then you need to STOP IT. Stop being an arrogant Look around. Learn from some “dumb” guys… and let them teach you how to get what you REALLY REASON #3: POOR SOCIAL SKILLS It BLOWS MY MIND how many smart guys I meet that just don’t GET IT when it comes It’s as if they have logically reasoned that social skills are for lower beings In fact, I believe that there are a lot of smart guys running around this planet who don’t even have “social skills” and “be a cool guy that people like” in their “MENTAL Social skills are just that… SKILLS. They’re not social INFORMATION. They’re not social THEORIES. They’re social SKILLS. And you don’t get them by THINKING about them. You get them by GETTING them. Excellent social skills are the foundation for good communication with other humans… REASON #4: THEY PSYCH THEMSELVES OUT Smart guys do something that fascinates the hell out of me… They come up with all the reasons why everything WON’T WORK when it comes to women They actually figure out why what they would like to do will probably fail… They use their amazing creative imaginations to imagine all kinds of horrible THEY DON’T EVEN TRY. Now, if you’ve thought something through and come up with a good reason why it I mean, why would you want to do things that are going to fail? It’s sound logic, but HORRIBLE thinking when it comes to the REAL WORLD… and Because smart guys don’t UNDERSTAND women, and they don’t UNDERSTAND what it takes Using your mind to come up with all the reasons why things won’t work in this You must learn to overcome this habit if you have it. REASON #5: THEY SEEK ONLY “INFORMATIONAL SOLUTIONS” What does a smart guy do when he runs into a problem… or he needs to figure He looks for INFORMATION to help him solve the problem. MORE INFORMATION is always the answer. Information is the friend of a smart guy. Got a strange virus on your computer? Just hop on the internet and search for Don’t know how to change the alternator on your car? No prob. Just buy the manual Don’t know the definition of a word? Open up your dictionary. MORE INFORMATION solves the problem. So what do smart guys do when it comes to overcoming a problem with women? They want MORE INFORMATION. They think the answer lies in learning just ONE MORE TECHNIQUE… or one more Well what if there were a situation in life where the “get more information” strategy How would you even know that it was making things worse? Now, I don’t want to suggest that learning more about how to be successful with But if you have a problem that is EMOTIONAL or PHYSICAL in nature, then reading You need to get out in the real world and try some stuff! You need to look at the REAL problem… the ROOT of the problem. When it comes to women and dating, there’s a very good chance that you have MORE Smart guys often use “more information” to distract them from TAKING ACTION. I’ve heard this referred to as “Creative Avoidance”. Nod silently if you’ve ever figured out a creative way to avoid facing something Good, thank you. REASON #6: THEY FOCUS ON LOGIC INSTEAD OF EMOTION NEWS JUST IN: Women don’t feel ATTRACTION for men who make them THINK. Women feel ATTRACTION for men who make them FEEL. So what do most smart guys do when they first meet a woman? EXACTLY! They get into a LOGICAL CONVERSATION. I’m shaking my head right now… Smart men try to engage women in LOGICAL conversations and interactions because Get this: A monkey sitting at a typewriter will type the collected works of Shakespeare When you start a logical conversation with a woman you’ve just met, you are basically Typical “logical” conversations include talking about work, family, school, and On the other hand, if you start talking to a woman and you say “OK, so tell me If you don’t know what I’m talking about, keep reading. You need more help than REASON #7: THEY’RE NOT USED TO THE CHALLENGE OF THE MOMENT Smart people usually have time to THINK about things. If you’re taking a test, you can sit there and work out the answers. If you have a math problem, you can work on it until you’ve figured it out. If you’re trying to fix something, you can keep working on it until it’s fixed. Smart guys are used to being able to take at least a LITTLE bit of time to prepare Not so with women… If you don’t know what to do at every step along the way, you’ll be shut down Women have an AMAZING “He doesn’t get it” radar system. Women have all kinds of subtle and ingenious tests that they throw at men to separate And if you don’t get it, then you’re going to fail one of these tests VERY quickly. But the worst part is that you won’t ever KNOW that you were being tested… OR Smart guys aren’t used to dealing with complex EMOTIONAL and COMMUNICATION challenges One of they keys to becoming more successful with women and dating is learning But before you can learn how to deal with the tests, you must first learn how REASON #8: THEY THINK THAT DOING “NICE” THINGS IS THE “SMART WAY” OK, let me ask you a trick question: If I told you that you were going to have a date with the supermodel of your choice, 1) Find out what her favorite type of flowers are, and show up with a dozen of 2) Learn about her favorite travel destination so you could discuss it with her. 3) Find out what her favorite type of food is so you could take her to dinner… OK, time’s up. Which did you choose? Now, I already mentioned that this was a TRICK question. The answer is NONE OF THE ABOVE. But WHY? These three options all seemed logical, right? I mean, why WOULDN’T you want to show up with her favorite flowers? Why WOULDN’T you want to talk about her favorite places to travel? Why WOULDN’T you want to take her to eat her favorite foods so she enjoyed herself? Go with me here… Smart guys think that they’re being CLEVER when they do things like buying a woman Right? In their minds, they’re thinking “I’m going to be the guy who is thinking ahead… Makes sense… good math, right? Well the one teensy-weensy mistake that these “smart” guys make is not realizing In fact, ANY jackass can figure out how to kiss a woman’s ass. And guess what? WOMEN KNOW THIS! And guess what else? EVERY WUSSBAG DOES THIS STUFF. An intelligent guy, in his proud arrogance, will think he’s being such the charmer …and the woman he is chasing will interpret it as just another Wussy who’s trying Ouch. Another blow to intelligence. MISTAKE #9: ALWAYS NEEDING TO BE THE EXPERT Have you ever met a smart guy who always needed to be “right”? Have you ever met someone who would actually argue with you about something they Over the last few years helping guys improve their success with women, I see this Smart guys don’t like to be “beginners” at ANYTHING. They don’t like the idea of screwing up… especially if others are watching. They want to maintain this “smart guy” image of themselves… so they try to always Instead of saying “Hey, you know what? I’m a beginner at this… how do I do it? …they won’t risk embarrassment, failure, or others thinking that they’re beginners… MORE NEWS JUST IN: It’s OK to be a beginner. MISTAKE #10: THEY CAN’T DEAL WITH FEAR AND OTHER EMOTIONS A smart guy’s STRENGTH is his MIND. His WEAKNESS is often his EMOTIONS. Smart guys are often IMMOBILIZED by FEAR. Totally stopped. FROZEN. And since many smart guys aren’t comfortable dealing with things they’re not good Many men would rather DIE in lonely isolation than admit that they don’t know Hey, I went for YEARS like this. I know what it’s like. But the reality is that any guy can learn to handle and even MASTER his emotions If this is you, then do yourself a big favor… take the time. Take the effort. Don’t worry about what anyone else thinks of you… it doesn’t matter. What matters is you doing the things that YOU need to do FOR YOU. …I think the reason why I’m so fascinated with “The Genius Failure Paradox” Now, I’m not saying that I’m the smartest guy on the planet… But I don’t think mamma raised no fool. And it always bothered the hell out of me that even though I was so good at figuring Something tells me that you know what I’m talking about. Well, after beating my head against the wall for a few years… trying all kinds Of course, I found out that you could be both NOT SMART, and VERY SUCCESSFUL WITH I also learned that you can be SMART and VERY SUCCESSFUL WITH WOMEN too. By carefully studying what the “naturals” did with women… and learning how they Much of what I learned was very tough for me to accept… because my logical brain One thing I saw was guys pushing women away from them… and having the women Made no sense at all. I saw guys tease beautiful women and make jokes about them to their faces… and It took me quite a long time, but I continued to learn, test, and refine what …and most importantly, GET RID of that “empty” feeling that I carried around And once I got this area of my own life together, I decided to help other guys The ultimate result of all this time, effort, and energy is my free Dating Tips
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David DeAngelo ________________________________________________________________ © 2001-2008 David DeAngelo Communications Inc, |
David DeAngelo
Written By: Wisdom d'Avi